How gender discrimination affects girls’ daily lives in Pakistan — Assembly

13-year-old student activist Fatima Binte Muhammad envisions a future where girls’ voices are heard and valued.

I will never forget the sad looks on everyone’s faces when my little sister was born. Why were they so sad? Because it was another girl being born into the family. Everyone was sympathetic to my mom, saying “You can always try again in a few months.” At that very moment it was very apparent to me that girls are not always welcomed by families in our society.

At school, my friends and I faced gender discrimination from the boys and even the teachers. I remember once saying in class that my dream was to be a politician — but a few boys just laughed and said, “Girls can’t even be politicians because they aren’t emotionally stable.” This statement really demotivated me. What was even worse was when sexist behaviour like that happened, female teachers would just ask girls to ignore such comments. I tried reporting the gender discrimination I experienced at school to the principal but he didn’t care. I started to understand that society has different rules and expectations for girls compared to boys.

Some people in Pakistan expect girls to grow up to be women who have to take care of the house chores like cooking, cleaning, clothes and children. I’ve seen parents marry their daughters off at an early age because they’ve seen them talking to boys. People shame girls for talking too loud, for not tying their hair properly or for wearing certain clothes. This happens in schools all the time — teachers and other students shame girls for wanting to play or for having male friends. I still remember when my friends and I wanted to participate in sports, but the guys looked down upon us and said that we could never compete with them.

“I have seen many people approach my mother and tell her not to send me to school because “when I grow up I’ll always be in the kitchen” so there’s no need for me to learn. This stereotypical thinking is why so many families don’t send their daughters to school.”

— Fatima Binte Muhammad

My mother and father don’t believe in these discriminatory gender norms. They don’t see anything wrong with having two daughters and our extended families are supportive of us. My parents understand that every girl deserves basic rights, including the right to an education. But others think differently from them and don’t see the value that girls have to offer. Some people in our community are even pressuring my mother to have a boy. Hearing that makes me feel worthless and like I’m a burden to my mother. At times it has even made me hate myself.

I don't really understand why they say things like this. I am sad and disappointed when I see the attitude our society has towards girls because we can do better. In the 21st century, all genders should have equal rights. A girl can work, take part in sports and do whatever a boy can.

One way we can help make change is to focus more on teaching all students gender equality when they’re in the classroom. The safety of girls within the education system is very important, too, so that girls can learn freely and parents can send their daughters to school without being afraid that teachers or staff will harass them. I have seen many cases where male teachers and professors sexually harass the girls or make them feel uncomfortable. When these things happen, it impacts the girl’s ability to study and makes the parents worried and they decide not to send their daughters to school.

We also need to change attitudes about girls’ futures. I have seen many people approach my mother and tell her not to send me to school because “when I grow up I’ll always be in the kitchen” so there’s no need for me to learn. This stereotypical thinking is why so many families don’t send their daughters to school.

With the way I’ve seen girls treated, I’ve wondered if it’s bad to be born a girl. I’ve wondered if I could change into a boy so my life would be better. I’ve started to hate men after seeing how women spend their whole lives serving men. I don’t want other girls to feel like I’ve been made to feel. When I grow up, I want to be a politician and I will ensure that our government protects the rights of girls and women. Many people tell me this dream is impossible because a politician has a lot of responsibilities that I could never fulfil because I’m a girl.

I choose not to listen to them.

When I’m a politician, I plan to open up many educational institutions that support girls and encourage them to follow their dreams. I will raise funds so girls belonging from lower class families can afford to send them to school. I know I will have been successful when all girls are independent, successful and confident in their inherent self-worth and value.